calm

How to Make Stillness and Deep Breathing a Habit

Moon, sky and Lake Ontario at dusk

Have you ever said, or heard someone say, "Deep breathing doesn't work"?

This got me thinking about habits like say, brushing your teeth. If you only do it occasionally you could say that it doesn’t really work either.
 
Why is it so hard to develop a new habit?
 
There’s a lot of information about how to change a BAD habit but what about building a new one from scratch?
 
Let’s face it, we already know what’s good for us.
 
Try this:

Think about a new habit that you’ve been trying to add to your repertoire.
Got it?
Now see if the journey below sounds familiar.
 
We know how to do the thing.
We can even figure out when.
We sort of know why.
 
But still we don’t do it, at least not regularly.
 
Here come the excuses…
No time.
Too tired.
Forget.
Too hard.
Not urgent enough.
 
Then…
We feel guilty.
We feel defeated.
We’re okay without it.
We forget about it all together.
 
Until…
We realized we need it.
Something’s got to change.
 
AND WE START AGAIN!
 
YAY! WE START AGAIN!
 
This is so important that you need to say it out loud, tweet it, Instagram it or throw it up on Facebook, but share the message loud and proud:

“It’s okay to start again!”

Life’s a journey, you’re on your path, enjoy each day as it comes, try and try again…I know, you’ve heard it all before.
 
My all-time favourite way to fire up a new habit is to anchor it to something I’m already doing.
Let’s say you want to remember to practise your deep breathing. Maybe anchor it to when you get into bed, or just before you brush your teeth, or when you park car, or just before the first sip of your morning coffee?
 
Stress is going to wear you out!

Deep, diaphragmatic breathing triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which boosts the immune system, digestion, your pre-frontal cortex, where you have access to deep thinking, new ideas and more compassion. Click here for my infographic on the benefits.

Now back to the quote at the top of the page, Deep breathing doesn’t work for me.”

 If we only try to breathe deeply during a crisis of anxiety or extreme stress, there’s a chance deep breathing won’t help. The calm deep breath we’re talking about here, is best used as a preventative tool.

We want to build up our emotional resilience and actually change our brain so that the challenges of our life don’t overwhelm us and set us up for stress, illness, worry and suffering.

The more you use this calming tool, the more you and your body will benefit!

Helping you smooth out your day!

Michele

Calm Down with Animals

"You got to get away from words if you want to understand any animal. It thinks in pictures, it thinks in smells, it thinks in touch sensations - little sound bites like, it's a very detailed memory." 

Temple Grandin

Find Calm with Animals

My daughter started a new job this week and it just so happened that there was a beautiful 12 year old senior dog in the office.

Needless to say, the first day at a new job is a little STRESSFUL. You're meeting a ton of new people, you have to get to know the tech, procedures and log in's. Everything is new.

Guess where the dog, named Shorty, chose to hang out for the day?

Yup, under the new employee's desk! What a gift it was for my daughter to have this beautiful animal to connect with!

So, once a week, this office has a dog hang out with everyone. I know it's not a new idea to have pets in the workplace but this example really emphasized how ANIMALS CAN HELP us humans to DE-stress. They can teach us to live in the moment and love unconditionally, and they're great, non-judgmental ENERGY readers, with the ability to sense the FEEL of a ROOM and the PEOPLE in it.

Count yourself lucky if you live with an animal family member. My beautiful Labrador Retriever crossed the rainbow bridge years ago but I can find comfort connecting with the memory of her. 

There's no doubt about it, patting, holding or having a pet nearby can be calming and comforting. Therapeutic Paws of Canada, Caring Canine: Toronto Therapy Dogs and St. John Ambulance Therapy Dog Program all offer a variety of programs that connect a dog with seniors, adults, teens and children. These programs help with everything from stress reduction, autism, pain management to helping children read. Pet Partners list many studies supporting the benefits of the human animal bond.

So what happens if you don't have direct access to a pet? 

Well, getting out in nature, and listening and observing the wildlife around you, will certainly help to increase your odds of experiencing some calming mindful moments.  I love to watch the way animals and birds interact and communicate.
Once you start noticing, you'll see even more interactions and then you might find yourself looking forward to those moments. 

Of course you could go to the zoo or aquarium or a dog park, and who doesn't love those funny Facebook pet videos. Careful with this one because once you go there you might not be back until tomorrow!

The next time you're near a pet or out in nature, check in to your body and notice your tension levels and your breathing.
Do you start to let go and relax?
Can you gently slow your breath?
Are you able to connect and just BE with the animal? 
Does your heart soften or a smile come to your lips?

If this resonates with you and if you discover that your MIND gets a break from all the CHATTER, then you can use the memory of these experiences to access this positive feeling later on, when you need it. A positive memory can go a long way to putting a smile on your face just like the memories of my yellow Labrador can.

Helping you smooth out your day!  Michele

click the image below to start meditating today!

Caregivers-How Heavy is Your Worry Load?

"If you have someone who has many things going wrong and one thing going right, beat the drum of what's going right, and let that be your point of attraction." Abraham-Hicks, San Diego, 2003


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When I look beyond the headlines and examine humanity, at the ground level, I'm truly in awe of all the caregivers among us. For some it's a vocation or calling, while for others it's just 'what they do'. Sometimes the need is great and very demanding and other times it requires the subtle moments of a look, smile or presence. 

Even when you don't have all the answers, solutions, or next steps, you have enough energy and compassion to sit with the problem, and when you can do this without the WORRY THOUGHTS about tomorrow, you can begin to activate a very strong vibration of LOVE. When your mind (thought) activity gets calm, your heart can feed YOUR energy.

I know that you're constantly 'giving care', of one kind or another, to your family and others in your life, and while we often talk about exhaustion and OVERWHELM, and the need for self-care, part of that should include our mental experience. I know that a big part of caring is DOING but another big part is THINKING.

Who ever THOUGHT that THOUGHTS could be so exhausting? But they are, and they can keep us up at night too.

By tapping into your heart energy you can begin to find a way to FUEL UP.
How can you access this fuel?

I've been re-reading a lot of Eckhart Tolle these days and practising stepping out of my thought storms so I can WITNESS the habitual nature of OVER-THINKING. I try to gently feel the aliveness of my hands, my body, and my breath. When I do that I can momentarily escape, or rather, take a break from thought, and re-fuel.   

If you're looking to calm down your worry thoughts check out my quick, printable meditation cheat sheet HERE.

Another Step on Your Path - Michele

Seriously?

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What's with the news? TV newscasts (and news channels) seem to be worse than radio broadcasts and radio is worse than newspapers. What am I talking about? Bad news. So, how does our BRAIN feel about watching the news?

The Merriam -Webster definition of the word NEWS is:  
a a report of recent events
b previously unknown information
c something having a specified influence or effect

This definition seems fairly harmless and neutral; news isn't only BAD. Why then are newscasts generally so negative and stressful?

Our eyes and ears are taking in 'STRESS MESSAGES' and, even though we're usually far removed from the events, we humans will be experiencing, connecting, sensing and feeling them. I can almost feel my brain bending toward judgement, negativity, outrage, shock, fear and stress.

You might be THINKING that it's important to know what's going on in the world and I may be WONDERING if I'm taking things too seriously or overreacting, but for the most part the news doesn't really influence me enough to take action, to grow. 

There are 7.4 BILLION PEOPLE on the planet, many of whom move through their lives creating, designing, inspiring, discovering, assisting, loving, inventing and exploring, and the newscasts can barely muster up a couple of feel good stories-one of which tends to be the latest viral video from YouTube or Facebook. Here's a RHETORICAL QUESTION, and a topic for another day, does a newscast's content get built by ratings?

Okay, I don't want to live with my head in the sand but lately I've become more AWARE of what I feed my brain and as a seeker of NEWS I want it to nudge me forward in my life. 
As I look for BETTER BALANCE I think I'll turn the TV off!